Romance is alive and well it seems. Over 300,000 weddings will take place in the UK this year at an average cost of £14,000, that’s a total nationwide spend of £4.2 billion.

But whilst the bride’s parents have traditionally picked up the bill for the big day, it’s not just the bride and groom who are now meeting the responsibility of the costs. It appears that increasingly and more indirectly wedding guests are now contributing cash as well, at the happy couple’s request.

Research from Abbey National by BMRB shows a third of guests (33 per cent) give the bride and groom money or vouchers instead of a gift. This is most popular in the north west (43 per cent), compared with the south west at just 12 per cent. Three out of five (60 per cent) of respondents say they don’t mind being asked to give money instead of a wedding gift.

But how much should guests give?

• Nearly two thirds of respondents (64 per cent) would give the couple between £25 and £75.00.
• It seems wedding guests in the north west are the most likely to give this amount (69 per cent).
• However, guests in London and the Midlands are the most generous with seven per cent willing to give £200 or more.

The research reveals, however, that wedding cash is not for frittering away. Four out of five (80 per cent) guests want their gift money to help finance the couple’s future plans, particularly in Scotland (90 per cent). Only nine per cent want the money to be spent on the wedding or honeymoon, with the Scottish showing the strongest objections to this.

First nuptial arguments?

When given cash instead of presents, the bride and groom have different ideas on how to spend the money. Almost a third (30 per cent) would spend it on household goods but this option is more favoured by women (39 per cent) than men (23 per cent). Men are more likely to use the money towards a deposit for a house (22 per cent) compared to their new wife (18 per cent).

Alexia Kilby, Abbey National’s Head of Savings Marketing said: “It’s important that newlyweds spend their financial gifts wisely as it’s all too easy to fritter it away on things they don’t really need. Using the money for future plans such as a house deposit is a great idea as often couples may struggle to continue saving after the wedding with so many outstanding bills waiting for them on return from honeymoon”.

Although couples do receive cash from guests, they still face the bulk of the financial burden of paying for the wedding (49 per cent). The more traditional route of the bride’s parents paying (49 per cent) also continues, and is particularly prominent in the North (69 per cent) and in Wales (65 per cent). In the south west 20 per cent of brides fund their own big day but in Yorkshire more men (27 per cent) are prepared to foot the bill. Tradition is turned on its head in East Anglia with 32 per cent of grooms’ parents paying for weddings.

For couples that do pay the wedding costs themselves it can take time to save the money. This could explain why almost two fifths (38 per cent) of couples are engaged for at least eighteen months before they marry, and over one in ten (11 per cent) wait for five years or more. Almost a third of couples (30 per cent) said that if money were not an issue they would have married sooner.

If couples choose to save to pay the total average cost of a wedding themselves, they would have to put aside £1167 every month to marry a year after their engagement. When it comes to financing their wedding, 76 per cent use savings, just 7 per cent use credit cards, and one in 20 take out a personal loan. Little wonder they need cash as a wedding gift for future plans.

Alexia Kilby, said: “Planning a wedding is a stressful time for everyone involved and financing it can be a problem if you haven’t made suitable provisions.”

“Raising £14,000 can take a considerable amount of time and often results in a long engagement if you cannot save a large sum each month”.

To help meet the high cost of the happy day Abbey National has a range of savings options to suit all needs. Including the cost of being a wedding guest it seems.